What’s your inner D&D 4th edition character?

25 questions. 1 answer.

Ever feel like your destiny isn’t to work in a tiny cubicle? Maybe it’s because your inner self is a Lawful Good Demigod Pit Fighter! You only have to answer a few questions to know what your inner D&D character is!

1 – Fighters are:

• Powerful.
• Overrated.
• Great lobbyists. Why else would all the spells be voted out of the core books?

2 – Wizards are:

• Powerful.
• Overrated.
• Sexy. It’s the robe – it looks cozy.

3 – Rogues are:

• Powerful.
• Overrated.
• Sexy. It’s the tight black leather – it looks kinky.

4 – My weapon of choice is:

• Something huge, like a greataxe.
• Something crude, like a club.
• Something normal, like a longsword.
• Something elegant, like a rapier.
• Doesn’t matter. I just want to kill things and take their stuff.

5 – My role in a party is to:

• Be a leader.
• Be a controller.
• Be a defender.
• Be a striker.
• Get the party started!

6 – Your boyfriend/girlfriend scolds you because you were out all night and didn’t say where you were. What do you do?

• A Diplomacy check.
• A Will save.
• A Fortitude save.
• I cast Forceful Retort.

7 – Tieflings are:

• Evil.
• Creepy.
• Horny.
• Usurpers of the gnomes’ place in the core books.

8 – Dragonborns are:

• Good.
• Ugly.
• The proof that everyone wants to be a dragon.
• Usurpers of the half-orcs’ place in the core books.

9 – Are you a DM or a player?

• DM.
• Player.
• Both.
• I don’t play D&D right now.

10 – Your favorite dragons are:

• Red dragons.
• Blue dragons.
• Black dragons.
• Green dragons.
• White dragons.
• Gold dragons.
• Silver dragons.
• Copper dragons.
• Adamantine dragons.
• Iron dragons.
• Dragon Turtles.

11 – Are you a good liar?

• Yes.
• No.
• I never lie.
• Doesn’t matter what the answer is since you can’t trust a liar.

12 – Which one of these activities would you rather do on a sunny Saturday morning?

• Study.
• Pray.
• Work out.
• Sleep.

13 – I really, really like to pwn:

• Goblins.
• Kobolds.
• Zombies.
• Noobs.

14 – I believe in:

• UFOs.
• Magic.
• Elves.
• All of the above.

15 – How often do you find yourself covered in blood?

• Less than once a week.
• One to five times a week.
• More than 5 times a week.
• What?

16 – You write a book and perform a sacrificial ritual to increase your sales. What do you sacrifice?

• A gnome.
• Something else.

17 – You see an old lady struggling going up a flight of stairs. What do you do?

• I help her up.
• I ignore her.
• I help her down.
• I punch her in the face.

18 – You’re taking a test and you see the guy next to you cheating. What do you do?

• I tell on him.
• I blackmail him.
• I ignore him.
• I punch him in the face.

19 – You have an appointment with a good friend. He shows up 45 minutes late. What do you do?

• I guilt trip him.
• I ask if he’s alright.
• I don’t even mention it.
• I punch him in the face.

20 – You killed something. What do you do?

• Take its stuff.
• Punch it in the face.
• What?

21 – When I’m drunk I always end up:

• Talking loudly.
• Telling everyone I love them.
• Drunk dialing people.
• Drunk dialing everyone to tell them I love them.
• I don’t drink.

22 – You bump into your best friend on the street. He stares at you wide-eyed and keeps saying “I am not an alien.” What do you do?

• Meh. My friends always do that.
• I ask him if he’s alright.
• I call the authorities.
• I punch him in the face.

23 – How would you describe the last D&D character you played?

• Unique.
• Powerful.
• Fun.
• 1337.

24 – Which magic weapon enhancement is the coolest?

• Flaming +6.
• Holy Avenger +6.
• Perfect Hunter’s +6.
• Lifedrinker +6.

25 – When I punch someone in the face I feel:

• Good.
• Bad.
• What?

$raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $dwarf;
$topRace = ‘Dwarf’;
}elseif($dwarf == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Dwarf’;
}

if($eladrin > $raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $eladrin;
$topRace = ‘Eladrin’;
}elseif($eladrin == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Eladrin’;
}

if($elf > $raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $elf;
$topRace = ‘Elf’;
}elseif($elf == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Elf’;
}

if($halfElf > $raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $halfElf;
$topRace = ‘Half-Elf’;
}elseif($halfElf == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Half-Elf’;
}

if($halfling > $raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $halfling;
$topRace = ‘Halfling’;
}elseif($halfling == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Halfling’;
}

if($human > $raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $human;
$topRace = ‘Human’;
}elseif($human == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Human’;
}

if($tiefling > $raceHighScore){
$raceHighScore = $tiefling;
$topRace = ‘Tiefling’;
}elseif($tiefling == $raceHighScore){
if(is_string($topRace)){
$topRace = array($topRace);
}
$topRace[] = ‘Tiefling’;
}

if(is_array($topRace)){
$topRace = $topRace[rand(0,count($topRace)-1)];
}

//CALCULATE CLASS
$classHighScore = $cleric;
$topClass = ‘Cleric’;

if($fighter > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $fighter;
$topClass = ‘Fighter’;
}elseif($fighter == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Fighter’;
}

if($paladin > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $paladin;
$topClass = ‘Paladin’;
}elseif($paladin == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Paladin’;
}

if($ranger > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $ranger;
$topClass = ‘Ranger’;
}elseif($ranger == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Ranger’;
}

if($rogue > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $rogue;
$topClass = ‘Rogue’;
}elseif($rogue == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Rogue’;
}

if($warlock > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $warlock;
$topClass = ‘Warlock’;
}elseif($warlock == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Warlock’;
}

if($warlord > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $warlord;
$topClass = ‘Warlord’;
}elseif($warlord == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Warlord’;
}

if($wizard > $classHighScore){
$classHighScore = $wizard;
$topClass = ‘Wizard’;
}elseif($wizard == $classHighScore){
if(is_string($topClass)){
$topClass = array($topClass);
}
$topClass[] = ‘Wizard’;
}

if(is_array($topClass)){
$topClass = $topClass[rand(0,count($topClass)-1)];
}

$alignment;
$article = ‘a’;

if($good >= $evil+3){
$alignment = ‘Good’;
if($lawful >= 3){
$alignment = ‘Lawful Good’;
}
}else if($evil >= $good+3){
$alignment = ‘Evil’;
$article = ‘an’;
if($chaotic >= 4){
$alignment = ‘Chaotic Evil’;
$article = ‘a’;
}
}else{
$alignment = ‘Unaligned’;
$article = ‘an’;
}

//Paragon Path
$path = ”;
$rnd = rand(1,100);
//echo $rnd;
if($rnd > 90){
if(trim($topClass) == ‘Cleric’){
$path = rand(1,4);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Angelic Avenger’;
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Divine Oracle’;
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Radiant Servant’;
}else if($path == 4){
$path = ‘Warpriest’;
}
}

if(trim($topClass) == ‘Fighter’){
$path = rand(1,4);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Iron Vanguard’;
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Kensei’;
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Pit Fighter’;
$topClass = ”;
}else if($path == 4){
$path = ‘Swordmaster’;
}
}

if(trim($topClass) == ‘Paladin’){
$path = rand(1,4);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Astral Weapon’;
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Champion of Order’;
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Hospitaler’;
}else if($path == 4){
$path = ‘Justiciar’;
}
}

if(trim($topClass) == ‘Rogue’){
$path = rand(1,4);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Cat Burglar’;
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Daggermaster’;
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Master Infiltrator’;
}else if($path == 4){
$path = ‘Shadow Assassin’;
}
}

if(trim($topClass) == ‘Warlock’){
$path = rand(1,3);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Doomsayer’;
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Feytouched’;
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Life-Stealer’;
}
}

if(trim($topClass) == ‘Warlord’){
$path = rand(1,4);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Battle Captain’;
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Combat Veteran’;
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Knight Commander’;
}else if($path == 4){
$path = ‘Sword Marshal’;
}
}

if(trim($topClass) == ‘Wizard’){
$path = rand(1,4);
if($path == 1){
$path = ‘Battle Mage’;
if(rand(1,100) > 100){
$path = ‘Battle Archmage’;
}
}else if($path == 2){
$path = ‘Blood Mage’;
if(rand(1,100) > 100){
$path = ‘Blood Archmage’;
}
}else if($path == 3){
$path = ‘Spellstorm Mage’;
if(rand(1,100) > 100){
$path = ‘Spellstorm Archmage’;
}
}else if($path == 4){
$path = ‘Wizard of the Spiral Tower’;
if(rand(1,100) > 100){
$path = ‘Spiral Tower Archmage’;
}
}
$topClass = ”;

}
}

//epic destiny

if($path != ” && rand(1,10) > 8){
if(trim($topClass) == ‘Rogue’ && rand(1,100) > 98){
$path = ‘Deadly Trickster ‘.$path;
}else if(rand(1,100) > 98){
$path = ‘Demigod ‘.$path;
}else if(rand(1,100) > 98){
$path = ‘Eternal Seeker ‘.$path;
}
}

//Adjustments
if(trim($topClass) == ‘Paladin’ || trim($topClass) == ‘Cleric’){
if(trim($alignment) == ‘Lafwul Good’){
if (rand(1,100) > 50){
$topClass .= ‘ of Bahamut’;
}else{
$topClass .= ‘ of Moradin’;
}
}else if(trim($alignment) == ‘Good’){
if (rand(1,100) > 50){
$topClass .= ‘ of Avandra’;
}else{
$topClass .= ‘ of Pelor’;
}
}else if(trim($alignment) == ‘Unaligned’){
$x = rand(1,70);
if ($x > 60){
$topClass .= ‘ of Corellon’;
}elseif ($x > 50){
$topClass .= ‘ of Erathis’;
}elseif ($x > 40){
$topClass .= ‘ of Ioun’;
}elseif ($x > 30){
$topClass .= ‘ of Kord’;
}elseif ($x > 20){
$topClass .= ‘ of Melora’;
}elseif ($x > 10){
$topClass .= ‘ of The Raven Queen’;
}else{
$topClass .= ‘ of Sehanine’;
}
}else if(trim($alignment) == ‘Evil’){
$x = rand(1,60);
if ($x > 50){
$topClass .= ‘ of Asmodeus’;
}elseif ($x > 40){
$topClass .= ‘ of Bane’;
}elseif ($x > 30){
$topClass .= ‘ of Tiamat’;
}elseif ($x > 20){
$topClass .= ‘ of Torog’;
}elseif ($x > 10){
$topClass .= ‘ of Vecna’;
}else{
$topClass .= ‘ of Zehir’;
}
}else if(trim($alignment) == ‘Chaotic Evil’){
if (rand(1,100) > 50){
$topClass .= ‘ of Gruumsh’;
}else{
$topClass .= ‘ of Lolth’;
$topRace = ‘Drow’;
}
}
}
$innerCharacter = $alignment .’ ‘.$topRace.’ ‘.$path.’ ‘.$topClass;
$sql = ‘INSERT INTO dungeon_innercharacter.survey VALUES (“‘.$_POST[‘Q1’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q2’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q3’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q4’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q5’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q6’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q7’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q8’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q9’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q10’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q11’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q12’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q13’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q14’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q15’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q16’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q17’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q18’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q19’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q20’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q21’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q22’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q23’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q24’].'”,”‘.$_POST[‘Q25’].'”,”‘.$alignment.'”,”‘.$topRace.'”,”‘.$path.’ ‘.$topClass.'”,”‘.$alignment.’ ‘.$topRace.’ ‘.$path.’ ‘.$topClass.'”)’;
$rs = query($sql);
}else{
$innerCharacter = $_SESSION[‘innerCharacter’];
}
?>

<a href=”http://www.dungeonmastering.com/gaming-life/whats-your-inner-dd-4th-edition-character” mce_href=”http://www.dungeonmastering.com/gaming-life/whats-your-inner-dd-4th-edition-character”><img border=”0″ src=”http://www.dungeonmastering.com/dnd-4e-inner-character-banner.php?ic=” /></a>

After analyzing your answers with state-of-the-art medieval fantastic artificial intelligence profiling technology, Dungeon Mastering is kinda pretty sure of whatever is being claimed here…

‘;
echo ‘Your inner character:
‘. $innerCharacter .’
‘;
$_SESSION[‘innerCharacter’] = $innerCharacter;

$sql = ‘SELECT * FROM dungeon_innercharacter.survey’;
$rs = query($sql);
$nbInnerChar = mysql_num_rows($rs);

echo ‘

Survey Statistics
‘;
echo ‘The survey was completed ‘.$nbInnerChar.’ times.
‘;

$sql = ‘SELECT alignment, COUNT(alignment) as “cnt” FROM dungeon_innercharacter.survey GROUP BY alignment ORDER BY cnt DESC’;
$rs = query($sql);
echo ‘

Inner Character Alignment Demographics
‘;
while($survey = mysql_fetch_object($rs)){
echo round((($survey->cnt / $nbInnerChar) * 100),2).’% – ‘.$survey->alignment.’
‘;
}

$sql = ‘SELECT race, COUNT(race) as “cnt” FROM dungeon_innercharacter.survey GROUP BY race ORDER BY cnt DESC’;
$rs = query($sql);
echo ‘

Inner Character Race Demographics
‘;
while($survey = mysql_fetch_object($rs)){
echo round((($survey->cnt / $nbInnerChar) * 100),2).’% – ‘.$survey->race.’
‘;
}

$sql = ‘SELECT SUBSTRING_INDEX(class,” of”,1) as “icclass”, COUNT(class) as “cnt” FROM dungeon_innercharacter.survey GROUP BY icclass ORDER BY cnt DESC’;
$rs = query($sql);
echo ‘

Inner Character Class Demographics
‘;
while($survey = mysql_fetch_object($rs)){
echo round((($survey->cnt / $nbInnerChar) * 100),2).’% – ‘.$survey->icclass.’
‘;
}
/*
$sql = ‘SELECT inner_character, COUNT(inner_character) as “cnt” FROM dungeon_innercharacter.survey GROUP BY inner_character ORDER BY cnt DESC’;
$rs = query($sql);
echo ‘

Inner Character Complete Demographics
‘;
while($survey = mysql_fetch_object($rs)){
echo round((($survey->cnt / $nbInnerChar) * 100),2).’% – ‘.$survey->inner_character.’
‘;
}
*/

/*
//Classes
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘cleric: ‘.$cleric;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘fighter: ‘.$fighter;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘paladin: ‘.$paladin;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘ranger: ‘.$ranger;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘rogue: ‘.$rogue;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘warlock: ‘.$warlock;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘warlord: ‘.$warlord;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘wizard: ‘.$wizard;
echo ‘
‘;

//Races
echo ‘Dragonborn: ‘.$dragonborn;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘dwarf: ‘.$dwarf;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘eladrin: ‘.$eladrin;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘elf: ‘.$elf;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘halfElf: ‘.$halfElf;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘halfling: ‘.$halfling;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘human: ‘.$human;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘tiefling: ‘.$tiefling;
echo ‘
‘;

//Alignment
echo ‘good: ‘.$good;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘lawful: ‘.$lawful;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘evil: ‘.$evil;
echo ‘
‘;
echo ‘chaotic: ‘.$chaotic;
echo ‘
‘;
*/

}
?>